In 1997, Marie Claire magazine interviewed Waris, a
famous Somalia model, where she revealed that she had undergone female genital
mutilation, also known as FGM. This sparked worldwide media coverage and this
was also the year that Waris became a UN ambassador for the abolition of FGM. The
following year she wrote Desert Flower, an autographical book which included an
account of her FGM experience as a 5-year-old kid.
The book is not just about FGM. It is a real story of
how one’s strong will changes one’s fate. The book contains beautiful and
legendary depiction of Waris’s Nomadic childhood, how she fled almost
miraculously by walking barefoot across the desert to the city to escape the forced
marriage with a 60-year-old man, her life as a maid in the family of her
relative, a Somalia ambassador, in London, how she was discovered by famous
photographer and subsequently begun her career as a runway model, and her
subsequent return to Somalia and (again almost miraculous) reunion with her
mother.
I first came across the book by reading its excerpt from
Reader’s Digest years ago when I was in puberty (or, perhaps, even before
puberty). There was something that struck me more than the
black-swan-turn-into-swan line of story. My knowledge of cruel practice imposed
on women back then was pretty much limited to the old practice of “lotus feet” or foot-binding in China
which was abolished decades ago. Never did I know, before reading the excerpt,
that there is such practice affecting millions of young girls called FGM. Never
did I truly apprehend, until I read the entire book couple of months ago (and
many years after I first read the excerpt), how cruel FGM is.
I am reluctant to identify myself as a “feminist” as I do not think that I am
qualified for such an identity, at least, not now when I have not spent time
reading the serious literature on feminism. However, if such a term is used to
describe a female who feels the boundaries and limitations that women are
subject to because of their gender, I would say that, the older I get, the more
“feminist” I am.
Don’t get me wrong, that’s not
me. I have a lovely partner (who is a male for the avoidance of doubt) who
appreciates the way I am and bears with all my radical comments, for instance,
“Look, this research shows that mother is intrinsically more altruistic towards
the child than the father, as father always has inherent doubt on whether the
kid is his – kids should totally carry the surnames of their mums!”
Hence, compared with the adolescent-me, I now feel 10
times more aggrieved when re-reading the account of FGM in Desert Flower. Just imagine the pain and sufferings a girl as young
as 5-year-old went through – the flesh of the most sensitive part of the body
being cut-off (without anaesthetic and sterile procedure) and thereafter sealed
back, leaving only a tiny little hole
for urinating and menstrual flow!
If you still cannot apprehend what I was trying to
describe, here is an extract from Desert Flower:
“Mama leaned
over and whispered to me, “You know I can’t hold you. I’m on my own here. So
try to be a good girl, baby. Be brave for Mama, and it’ll go fast.” I peered
between my legs and saw the gypsy woman getting ready……She looked at me
sternly, a dead look in her eyes, then foraged through an old carpet bag. My
eyes were fixed on her, because I want to know what she was going to cut me
with. I expected a big knife, but instead, out of the bag she pulled a tiny
cotton rack. She reached inside with her long fingers, and fished out a broken
razor blade. Turning it from side to side, she examined it. The sun was barely
up now; it was light enough to see colour but no details. However, I saw dried
blood on the jagged side of the blade. She spade on it and wiped it against her
dress. While she was scrubbing, my world went dark as my mother tied a scarf
around my eyes as a blind fold.
The next thing I
felt was flesh, my genitals, being cut away. I heard the sound of the dull
blade sawing back and forth through my skin. When I think back, I honestly can’t
believe that this has happened to me. I feel as if I were talking about
somebody else. There’s no way in the world I can explain what it feels like. It’s
like somebody is slicing through the meat of your thigh, or cutting off your
arm, except this is the most sensitive part of your body. However, I didn’t
move an inch…I just sat there as if I were made of stone, telling myself the
more I moved around, the longer the torture would take. Unfortunately, my legs
began to quiver of their own accord, and shake uncontrollably, and I prayed.
Please, God, let it be over quickly. Soon it was, because I passed out.
When I woke up, I
thought we were finished but now the worst of it had just begun. My blindfold
was off and I saw the Killer Woman had piled next to her a stack of thorns from
an acacia tree. She used these to puncture holes in my skin, then poked a
strong white thread through the holes to sew me up. My legs were completely
numb, but the pain between them was so intense that I wished I would die.”
Graphic
illustration of different types of FGM extracted from the website of Wikipedia.
Waris, I believe, went through Type III, which is the most invasive type of
FGM.
A woman subject to FGM may be “cut” THREE times in her lifetime:
first when she underwent the FGM procedure, second when her husband cut her in
order to have sexual intercourse and the third time when she delivered child. In
some instances, women after child-birth are sown up again to make them “tight”
for their husband! Waris is the fortunate one who survived the first cut, one
of her sisters is not, and so are many other young souls in the other parts of
the world where such practice is still prevalent. Urinating and menstruation are
often painful and difficult for FGM-ed women, let alone enjoyment of sex. FGM-ed women are also subject to higher risk
of delivery complications.
But why FGM?
“FGM is
practiced for physiological, social, and symbolic reasons. It is used as a
sexual repressive device, in order to “protect” women from “their inherent
sexual nature and behaviour.” It is also believed to protect a woman’s
virginity and prevent adultery, as well as increase a man’s sexual pleasure
during intercourse. A “circumcised” female is also considered more beautiful.
Some societies view the procedure as a religious duty.”[1]
As Waris pointed out in the book, a woman without
going through FGM in Somalia is not considered “marriage-able”. Therefore,
parents are often anxious to make sure that their girls are cut. Few years back
when I attended a seminar on human rights during my Master study, a beautiful
girl with deep eyes (from Pakistan, if I remember correctly) raised a comment
that the West often super-imposed their concepts and virtues of human rights or
democracy but what is right in the West does not necessarily suit the rest of
the world. I often remember this comment and am often conscious of respecting
cultural difference. Can the practice of FGM, however, be defended in the name
of God or cultural pluralism? If we are talking about the procedure that Waris
went through, the answer is very clear, and I believe all of us would say an
unequivocal “no” irrespective of whether we are men or women, feminist or not.
To quote Waris: “Female genital mutilation is pure violence against girls.”
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Just some statistics…
Today, many countries in which FGM is practised have passed legislations to outlaw the practice. But the statistics still look quite scary:
- 6,000 girls[2] were circumcised every day.
- More than 125 million girls and women alive today have been cut in the 29 countries in Africa and Middle East where FGM is concentrated.[3]
- The practice also exists in European countries. Recent report shows that the practice has been carried out on 137,000 women and girls living in England and Wales. There are also reports revealing that immigrants in Europe send young girls out of the countries during summer holidays to undergo FGM.
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Aside from the revelation of FGM, Desert Flower is also an inspirational read. I enjoyed reading how Waris
appreciated her Nomadic life in Africa. I could relate it
to one of the books that I adored when I was younger – The Stories of Sahara by Sanmao (<撒哈拉沙漠> -三毛).
We are probably sick of all these talking that we need to treasure our food and water as there is none in Africa, but when this comes from somebody who had actually lived in Africa before, it does sound convincing and powerful: “My family struggled every day to have enough food. Buying a sack of rice was a big occasion for us…Yet, sadly, so many Americans are preoccupied with not eating. On one side of the world we’re struggling to feed people. On the other side of the world, people are paying to lose weight. I watch commercials on TV for weight-loss programs and I scream “You want to lose weight – go to Africa!...”
We are probably sick of all these talking that we need to treasure our food and water as there is none in Africa, but when this comes from somebody who had actually lived in Africa before, it does sound convincing and powerful: “My family struggled every day to have enough food. Buying a sack of rice was a big occasion for us…Yet, sadly, so many Americans are preoccupied with not eating. On one side of the world we’re struggling to feed people. On the other side of the world, people are paying to lose weight. I watch commercials on TV for weight-loss programs and I scream “You want to lose weight – go to Africa!...”
And
the book also prompted us to pause and ponder, why are we miserable? What are we
pursuing and chasing? Why are we rushing? Is there a reason why we are not happy? Isn’t the fact
that - we are breathing and living - itself worth celebrating?
“Another benefit
of growing up in Africa was that we were part of pure nature, pure life. I knew
life – I wasn’t sheltered from it. And it was real life – not some artificial substitute
on television where I’m watching other people live life…I learnt that happiness
is not what you have, because I never had anything, and I was so happy…I think
of evenings when we’d sit around the fire after we’d eaten, and laugh about
every little thing. And when the rains began and life was reborn, we
celebrated.”
“The U.S. is the wealthiest country in the world, yet everyone feels poor. And more than
bankrupt of money, everyone is bankrupt of time. Everybody’s got no time. No
time at all. “Get out of my way, man, I’m in a hurry!” The streets are packed
with people rushing here and there and chasing God only knows what.”
And lastly,
there is this question that I sometimes ask myself as well. Would this world be a
better world if it was ruled by women?
“These tribal wars, like the practice of
circumcision, are brought about by the ego, selfishness, and aggression of men.
I hate to say that, but it’s true. Both acts stem from their obsession with
their territory – their possessions – and women fall into that category both
culturally and legally. Perhaps if we cut their balls off, my country would
become paradise. The men would calm down and be more sensitive to the world.
Without that constant surge of testosterone, there’d be no war, no killing, no
thieving, no rape. And if we chopped off their private parts, and turned them
loose to run around and either bleed to death or survive, maybe they could
understand for the first time what they’re doing to their women.”
Perhaps,
instead of pursuing peace-talk or any sort of treaties which can at most
suspend but not end the war, we may wish to think outside the box, and
consider changing all leaders to women. The thought that her own child may be
killed will probably stop any mother from initiating any war.
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If you are wondering what you may do to support Waris’s
effort to end FGM, visit the website of Desert Flower Foundation
founded by Waris at http://www.desertflowerfoundation.org/en/.
Note: As I went through the research on FGM, I discovered that Type I FGM and other unclassified procedures are prevalent among the Muslim communities in Malaysia.[4] It appears that this type of FGM, or some claimed that it should be distinguished from FGM and be identified as “female circumcision” instead, causes little or no harm on girls’ health, and is the least extreme kind of FGM and often conducted on Muslim infants. Whilst I reserve my opinion on this kind of female circumcision and definitely do not intend to condemn this kind of practice (if, indeed, they cause no harm), I do think that there is a need for the Ministry of Health to do a study and regulate the practice such that it is conducted by licensed practitioners, as the procedure is often conducted by “mid-wives” in the rural areas.
[1] Source: http://www.humanityinaction.org/knowledgebase/252-culture-clash-designing-vaginas-fgm-and-dutch-policy. Also
see: http://www.endfgm.eu/en/female-genital-mutilation/what-is-fgm/why-is-it-practised/.
[2]
This figure may not be up-to-date. Source: http://www.theguardian.com/society/2012/nov/27/un-ban-female-genital-mutilation
[4] Some articles on female circumcision in Malaysia: http://www.globalpost.com/dispatches/globalpost-blogs/rights/female-genital-mutilation-southeast-asia-muslims; http://millaproject.org/samirs-story-how-he-saved-his-daughter-from-fgm/.
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